Last One...

This is my last blog post. It wish I had a really good reason about why I'm done with it but I don't. I wish I could say I'm too busy living life but that's not the case. Even with good intentions, some things are just not meant to be placed out in the world for all to see. As much as I enjoyed the writing, the anonymity (because let's face my 4 readers let me be pretty anonymous), the idea of just being able to say what I want, using it like a diary, it is not longer a source of happiness for me. So, goodbye my little blog. Thank you for what you have provided and allowed me to say.

~ with much love, always

I Found It.....

...the secret, holy grail to life, that is. Apparently, skinny people do things differently than normal people do to stay thin such as NOT EATING. No really, I'm not just being funny. They skip meals; they literally go hours and hours without food and I guess they are fine with that. I get headaches and really bitchy when I don't eat. Skinny people also take non-bloat pills. And stool softeners or laxatives to combat the constipation they get (ok, maybe not all of them get constipation and take these but the few I know, do) or to fit into a dress or just want to lose a few more pounds before the weekend. WTF? Are you kidding me? I know eating disorders exist and that not all skinny people have eating disorders but how the hell is this shit healthy? I'm all for getting skinny (trust me, I want nothing more than to lose 30 pounds!) but I don't think I'm willing to sacrifice my health to do it. Stepping off my soap box now (and I'm not being judgy, I promise; I'm just shocked, I suppose.


~with much love, always

Oh, how I miss writing! I have so little time these days between work, playing taxi driver to the kids getting them to all their activities - golf, track, theater rehearsal, sporting events, etc., social time with friends, family time, and my personal time (wait, what's that?) Because of all these things, this poor little neglected blog has taken a back burner. Ok, let's face it, this thing isn't even on the stove or on the kitchen for that matter! Update: I started to write this post during the school year when the kids had more activities. Now, I really only have to be home so they can go swimming or to take my son to the golf course. "Hurry up, Mommmmm!"

I'm not complaining (much) because the kids are mostly happy and well adjusted (oh dear lord, I hope!) and they make hair dye to cover up all the grey hairs I accumulate trying to fit it all in. Of course, I must make time for that appointment, too.....

It's funny how life works... one friend takes a smaller place in your life and new friends come in. The best friend is always there and I love her for it and I miss her always (enough to make me cry regularly) and I can't wait to see her in just 22 days!!! I wish we lived closer to each other so we could go for a coffee or a run (we both like to run alone but we could run alone, together, and help each other through rough times. Also, I made another new friend recently and found out that she has a blog and y'all know how obsessed I am with reading blogs (when I have time!) She's fun, cute, and exciting and I think we are a little bit alike. (I hope if she reads this, she's not offended.)

I'm sad these days. I can't quite put a finger on it and it's not debilitating but I just feel, well, sad. I know part of the reason is my unhappiness with my health and I hate that I'm not strong motivated enough to do what it takes. I know WHAT to do and HOW to do it; it's just me needing to get the motivation to actually DO it. Actually,

It feels good to write even though it's not my best post. Sometimes I worry too much about writing the perfect post and I think that's stopped me from posting many times in the past. So, I am sitting at my desk in a quiet office (everyone else went out to lunch) so I can take a few moments of uninterrupted time for myself and write. And it feels good.


~with much love, always